Let’s get this party started…
Welcome to my very first attempt at this thing we call “Blogging”. This idea of “Blogging” came to me one day as I was driving home from visiting my parents. My mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease in 2009, and I was driving home after a particularly challenging visit and felt an overwhelming sense of solidarity to others who might be experiencing the same type of loss that Alzheimer’s disease so happily forces on caregivers. Do others feel this sense of heaviness, loss, frustration, joy, fear, insecurity, love sadness and grief? I thought to myself, I can’t be the only one? It was then that I decided to do start a blog. Being a 40 something year old woman, I hadn’t a clue how to start. How does one find a name for a blog, what host site to use and how do I set up a home page? I had so many doubts about starting this blog. I have dyslexia and am a horrid speller, I thought right away that if I spell one word wrong, I wouldn’t be taken seriously. What if my humor isn’t interpreted right and I offend someone? What if…what if…what if….? After about 3 years of what ifing, it was time to get out of my head and onto paper. It’s time to move my grief forward, its time to maybe help at least one other person not feel alone. So here I am, humble, honest and at times angry, sad and hopefully a little funny, reaching out to your heart to share my journey as I relate to being my mother’s daughter.
The Purge
It’s been 3 years since my parents died. It took two years to finally settle their estate (thank you COVID). It’s been almost a year since I have looked at any of their documents. All their paperwork has been hiding out in the attic. It’s a few plastic bins that include years of personal documents. One…
Grief has no logic. That is what I have determined through this journey.
I recently read a really good book by Patti Callahan called Surviving Savannah (non-fiction). There was a statement that spoke so loudly to me. The statement was: “How do you survive the surviving”. How do we survive being the ones left behind? This simple statement has been stuck in my head and I can’t seem…
Grief and red hot anger
The anger was raging toward my mom for not showing up and I wanted everyone around me to feel my anger. I was exhausted from the sheer strength it took just to be kind. I keep getting angry at myself for not being logical. Why can’t I be more logical and less emotional? Why do…
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Shes her mother's daughter 